Tiffany in Futureland
?004 The Angst Guy (theangstguy@yahoo.com)
Daria and associated characters are ?004 MTV Networks
Feedback (good, bad, indifferent, just want to bother me, whatever) is appreciated. Please write to: theangstguy@yahoo.com
Synopsis: A sad ficlet with a happy ending. Tiffany Blum-Deckler stars in this topical political/sci-fi tidbit written in early November 2004, before the elections.
Author抯 Notes: The idea for this story came up in a conversation on PPMB about the future of the Fashion Club members.
Acknowledgements: My thanks to the Republican Party for producing such great and amusing characters as those in this tale.
*
Poor Tiffany
Schwarzenegger did not know which was worse: being the third wife in the trophy
harem of the Greater California Governor-for-Life, or the on-call Personal
Relaxation Facilitator for the Governor抯 allies. President Giuliani wasn抰 too
bad, and the revised Greater California marriage code had allowed her to become
the President抯 fourth (non-harem) wife, too, but sessions with Attorney
General Limbaugh made it hard not to think of sitting astride a gasoline
tanker. Thank Karma for her yoga lessons. And now that weird science-fiction
writer/historian, Gingrich, wanted to see her again, and that meant dressing up
in that awful tasteless Star Trek uniform. The twenty-first century was the
pits.
As she lay on her polywater bed and bemoaned her fate, her cell phone rang. It was her private cell phone, the special pink one designed by MicroSoft-Toshiba-Sony-IBM to have only one button so she wouldn抰 get confused when she made or took a call. She pushed the button and raised the phone to her ear. 揧es??o:p>
揅all for you, Your Highness Madame Third Lady of Greater California and the Pacific,?said the operator. Her voice lowered to a whisper. 揑t抯 from New York.?o:p>
牋牋牋牋牋?Tiffany抯
spirits immediately lifted. 揟hank Karma, I抣l take it!?she said, her mind
filling with cheerful plans. She knew just what would perk her up now梐 trip to
Manhattan to the United Nations. Secretary General Clinton knew how to treat a
lady.
Original: 11/05/04, revised 11/21/04
FINIS