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揥rite Where It Hurts?Alternate Story

A Fanfic brought to you by Angelinhel牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋牋?牋牋牋牋?kckli@yahoo.com

 

Disclaimer: I do not own Daria or any characters thereof.?MTV does. I抦 just having fun. Don抰 sue me. I have no money. The beginning of this is quoted from the episode 揥rite Where It Hurts?written by Glenn Eichler.

Feel free to reproduce or quote or whatever. Just put my name on it. And maybe my email. I抣l take the blame.

Short Summary: Daria抯 mom tells her to be honest about what she wants to happen, and use that in her story assignment. Daria writes her own 憇hipper story.

 

Helen - Daria, the easiest thing in the world for you is being honest about what you observe.

Daria - And...

Helen - What's hard for you is being honest about your wishes. About the way you think things should be, not the way they are. You gloss over it with a cynical joke and nobody finds out what you really believe in.

Daria - Aha! So my evil plan is working.

Helen - If you really want to be honest, be truthful about what you'd like to happen. There's a challenge.

Daria - When the hell did you learn so much about me?

Helen - It's a funny thing, Daria. You give birth to someone, you just get an urge to keep tabs on them.

Daria抯 Story:

Jane- I抦 out of burnt umber! I can抰 finish this painting without burnt umber!

Daria- Shall I get the matches so we can burn some umber?

Jane- Ha ha. I have to run to the store, I really need to finish this before the deadline. You coming?

Daria- I think I抣l pass. You do remember what happened the last time I went with you to get paint?o:p>

Jane- Ah,?揇aria in Blue?I remember it well. Come on, it wasn抰 that bad!

Daria- You weren抰 the one covered in 4 gallons of 憃cean blue?latex paint.

Jane- All in the name of art. Well, if you want to stay by yourself卆ctually Trent should be up soon, maybe you two can have some quality time together.

Daria- I hate you. Do you have anything to read? I forgot my book.

Jane (tosses a pack of playing cards at her)- Sorry. No books, gotta maintain my C average after all, can抰 have any books tempting me.

Daria- I抣l just play a rousing game of Go Fish by myself then.

Jane- I抣l be back soon enough. Maybe too soon if Trent wakes up?o:p>

Daria- If you don抰 leave soon, you抣l be stopping at the hospital on the way there.

Jane leaves. Daria opens the pack of cards, shuffling absentmindedly. Trent sticks his head in the door.

Trent- Janey? Oh, hey Daria.

Daria- Eep!

Lost in thought Daria is taken by surprise and manages to throw the cards she was shuffling, creating a grandiose mess.

Trent- Have you seen Janey?

Daria (blushing)- She went to get more paint. She should be back soon.

Trent- Oh. Why didn抰 you go with her?

He sits on the bed next to her.

Daria- It involved moving.

Trent (chuckles)- I hear that. So, what are you doing?

Daria- Well, I was deciding what card game to play and it looks like it抯 going to be 52 pickup.

She starts to pick up the cards strewn about the floor and bed.

Trent- I抳e been practicing for hours. I need a break.

Daria (VO)- Sleeping with your guitar again?

Trent- You wanna play a game?

Daria (blushing)- O-K. What game?

Trent- Hmmm, don抰 know many card games厀ar?

Daria- Have you ever played that game? It could take hours, maybe days.

Trent- Don抰 want to spend that much time with me? Or are you afraid you抣l lose?

He gives her 搕he look.?o:p>

Daria- All right. War it is.

They begin to play. Daria feels slightly awkward, Trent seems oblivious, as usual.

Daria (VO)- Say something! You can抰 just sit here for hours playing this ridiculous game without talking. Say something interesting. Like what? I don抰 know. Oh, great now I抦 arguing with myself in my head. Call the institute, we have a winner.

Trent- Daria!

Daria (snapping out of it)- Wha?

Trent- You won the point. Take your cards. (looks at her for a beat) What were you thinking about? New story idea?

Daria- Huh? Oh, yeah. You know, inspiration abounds during War.

Trent (misinterpreting)- Yeah there were some great songs from the Vietnam era. No one writes good rock like that anymore.

Daria- Not even you?

Trent (missing her slight sarcasm)- I try. Sometimes, I wonder if it抯 even worth it. I mean, what am I doing with my life? I抦 20 and I still live at home.

Daria- At least you don抰 live with your parents.

Trent (laugh, cough, cough)- Good one, Daria.

Daria- It抯 like I said before, at least you抮e going after your dream, instead of just sitting around waiting for life to happen to you. I hope I don抰 end up saying 揑f only I had...?I think it抯 worse to regret a missed opportunity than to regret a chance taken. At least you can say you tried.

Trent- Yeah卼hanks. You know, you always know what to say. I think you抣l make a great writer.

Daria- Thanks, Trent. I guess I抣l have to make that leap someday. To put it all on the line as a writer. I hope I have the guts.

Trent (leaning closer to her)- I know you can do it. Sometimes you just gotta take that chance.

Daria (looking up)- Yeah, sometimes you just have to take a chance?o:p>

Daria (leans forward) (VO)- What am I doing? Am I about to kiss Trent?

Trent doesn抰 back away. They kiss.

Daria (VO)- Oh my God! I抦 kissing Trent. And he抯 kissing me back!

They break it off, looking into each other抯 eyes.

Trent- Daria?

Daria- Yes?

Trent (in Jane抯 voice)- Are you done with your story? Do you want to get some pizza?

Daria (shakes head)- What?

Jane (enunciating slowly)- Are you done with your story? Do you want to eat pizza?

Daria- Uh, yeah, sure.

Jane- Wow, that must be some story you抮e writing. Can I read it?

Daria- No. I have to write a new one. There抯 no way I抦 giving this to O扤eill.

Jane- Ooooh! That good, huh?

Daria- You抣l never know.

Jane- And to think I show you all my art?o:p>

Daria (skeptical)- Really?

Jane- OK, you got me. Let抯 get some pizza.

They leave to go to Pizza King. Daria leaves her notebook on the bed.?It抯 open to the first page of the story. Trent sticks his head in the door.


Trent- Janey?

He walks into the room and looks at Jane抯 newest masterpiece, then spies the notebook on the bed. He would抳e ignored it, but sees his name written in the text. He picks up the notebook and reads Daria抯 short story. Then notices the title 揟hinking Honestly.?o:p>

Trent- Hmmmm?o:p>

He leaves the room carrying a tube of burnt umber paint, in search of a deck of cards.

 

 

Author抯 Notes:

This was my first fanfic.

The 揇aria in Blue?episode is left to your imagination where I抦 sure it will be much funnier. I will probably reference it in other fics.

If you don抰 know what 52 pickup is, usually it抯 when someone knows you don抰 know the game and suggests you play. Then they throw the cards all over and you have to pick them all up. Fun.

I抦 a 憇hipper I admit it! But I抦 also realistic. It probably wouldn抰 work out. I抳e been there. Oddly enough it was my brother抯 best friend, but I digress. If they ever did get together I抎 give it 3 months, tops. But 憇hipper fic will live on. Hope springs eternal. Or as my mom would say, and I抦 sure Daria would agree, 揕ive in hope, die in despair.?o:p>

Questions? Comments? Nutrition Facts? Email me! I love feedback.

 

Copyright (sorta) Angelinhel March 2003